Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Training for Men...

Fall Classes for men...
Registration must be completed by Monday August 6 , 2007
Note: due to the complexity and difficulty level
of their contents, class sizes will be limited to 8 participants maximum.


Classes begin Monday, August 20 , 2007

Class 1 ~ How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2 ~ The Toilet Paper Roll -- Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3 ~ Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and
Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?
Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10 :00 PM for 2 hours.


Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor.
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturday at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5 ~ After Dinner Dishes - Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7 :00 PM.

Class 6 ~ Loss Of Identity -- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM.

Class 7 ~ Learning How To Find Things -- Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum .
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8 ~ Health Watch -- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9 ~ Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost -- Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesday at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10 ~ Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday noon, 2 hours.

Class 11 ~ Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing .
Tuesday at 7:00 PM, location to be determined.

Class 12 ~How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours ! Beginning at 7:00 PM.


Class 13
~ How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy -- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling If You're Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered .
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14 ~ The Stove/Oven -- What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesday at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued
to the survivors.

3 comments:

Autn Julie said...

This is tooooo CUTE!!!
Where'd U find it? or is this an original w/U living in a house of "guys"? I got to get my man signed up for a couple. "tee hee"

Kelley said...

So hilarious!

My husband says, "What are you laughing at?"

"Nothing, honey."

Kelley said...

oh, my favorite, hands-down is:

Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor.
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.

My entire family could use a refresher course on this subject at least a couple times a year.