Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Moms for Modesty and My Own Experience

Modestybutton I've been on several blogs that are promoting this Moms for Modesty campaign. I do agree with the fact that little girls should dress appropriately. Not having any little girls myself I cannot tell you what I would do in each situation but I do have a good idea. I've also heard all the controversy. Please read my story and see my point of view...

When I was about 17 I had a cousin try to rape me in my own home. I don't often share this with people because it is a hard thing to talk about. That night I was wearing denim overalls, a t-shirt and had my hair in a pony-tail. We were at church and I had forgotten something at home (2 doors down). I went back to grab it and my cousin followed. I went to my room not knowing what would happen next. I don't really need to go into details but you get the picture. It was only by the grace of God that there was a noise in the other room that scared him off of me and made him leave. He threatened me not to tell and I took him seriously! That night we returned to the church together where I tried to act normal. I cried myself to sleep in the same bed that night. About a year later, he was still hanging around and actually started dating one of my best friends. I had finally gotten up enough courage to tell my Mom what happened. It was a long night and the police finally got involved but we didn't press charges. I lived with an order of protection from the court for about 18 months and not once did he try and contact me.

I've had my share of couseling and I still have to deal with this on a daily basis. My Mom never once had to worry about what I was wearing or how I left the house. I dressed very appropriately for a girl of any age.

Some men just have very dirty minds and some men are very respectful of women. Either way, I think it's important to dress like a lady and to teach our little girls to do the same!!

Please go over to Jules' site and check out what she has to say. Other blogs talking about it... Shannon, Theresa, Barbara, Chilihead, The Hutch, and Bean Brain.

10 comments:

voni said...

It takes alot of courage to share a story like this. You are not alone. It doesn't matter what you are wearing to a preditor the fact is that he saw an opportunity and took advantage of it. I can understand your concern.

Kate said...

I applaud you for sharing such a raw spot from your experiences. I am so glad to hear it was not worse. God is so good!! But I know it still affects you today. Thanks for sharing this. It really does hit home on how we need to pay attention to how we dress our children.

Tina said...

I am sure that was hard to share...makes me want to pray for Sarah even harder. Thanks for the reminder!

Shalee said...

Oh Stacey... what a tragedy, but what a blessing you to us. Through your dreadful, ugly experience, you are encouraging all of us to lean on each other and to let God's healing run it's course. This is not to say that you will ever forget it; it's to show that by remembering your plight, you are an example of what it is to love God through the pain in this world.

Thank you for sharing a part that made you strong.

Addie said...

So so sorry that this is part of your story Stacey! Some men are just reprobates, and the way a girl dresses has nothing to do with that.

But I agree that teaching little girls to dress appropriately is so very important! Thanks for your story Stacey!

jen said...

I'm so sorry that happened to you!

There are definitely sick people out there.

I'm glad you were protected from what could have happened.

Thanks for writing!

(and thanks for the link to my site :)

Rabbit said...

Stacey, thank you for sharing your story. I do hope we've been clear in asserting that attire, immodest or not, is never an excuse for assault. I appreciate your support of MFM as well as the links!

Susanne said...

Stacey: Thanks for coming by my place and leaving a comment! I'm so sorry that this happened to you. Thanks for having the courage to share that. What a girls wears is never an excuse for anybody for any attack. And I totally agree with you, it is still important to teach our girls to dress appropriately.

theresa said...

Wow Stace, that's a pretty moving story. I'm so sorry that happened to you. But I'm so glad you had your faith and family to get you through it. Thanks for joining the MFM group. This only shows that it doesn't matter how you dress we all have to be aware!

Oh, and thanks for the link love!

GiBee said...

Oh, hun, I'm so sorry you went through this... I can tell that God has been working to heal your heart.

Thank you for the courage it took to share this with all of us!